Sleepy Rant!!!

Ok here goes. I have alot to say and no one to say it too... many times I think, am I the only girl alive thinking this? Im 18 years old, I dont have a boyfriend, im almost positive im not going to do too well in exams this summer on account of my acute "Pre-Exam-Jitters" meaning ive basicaly buried my head in the sand and ignored revision & coursework. I have a job that I DESPISE, I mean despise..I work in a place full of guys and men who all treat me like crap & my mum has just lost her job.
OH JOY. Okay I feel so selfish being so down about all this but surely its normal?
I feel so empty all the time, what I love to do is perform and when im not doing a show/rehearsing for one I just feel so bored.

I will adress each moan in turn. I honestly don't think I will have a boyfriend in my teen years now, I still cling on to such a romantisized view it is impossible for me to see guys for what they are. I want all this lovey, passionate shit. I watched Kay Mellors "A Passionate Woman" the other day and felt utterly inspired to stand on my roof and scream "I AM A PASSIONATE WOMAN" at the top of my voice. Alas I did not. I am not THAT dramatic.
Exams- Last year I did very well. This year is another story. Since getting accepted into stage school (where I dont really need grades) I have just lost motivation..I don't want to fail but I just keep ignoring the fact that exams are just weeks away. I leave school in some 10 days and I'm just waiting till its over so I can ignore looming deadlines even more.
My Job- I work in a crappy supermarket up the road. I work two shifts both are male dominant with guys my age. I hate it..not only do I get bored monotonously repeating the phrase "Would you like a bag?" over and over again but the guys I work with a complete idiots. Either they are taking the whole shop worker jobby far too seriously or they are farting into tanoys fun. They all seem to think they hold some hierachy over me aswell, whether it  is because im a girl, because they generaly don't like me or just think I dont put the milk in the right order. I simply dont care enough about a job like that to muster any kind of motivation for it.
No one is reading my blogs and quite frankly I am not surprised, I should think of more interesting things to say.
I will when they happen and trust me...very occasionaly they do ;)
xoxo
DQ